I didn't want to make too much of a big deal about it. A friend told me that as I am having my problems coping with this to write it out.
In the last few days (its been a week now, a little more than that) I still have issues letting go of raiding. I feel the burning inside me to want to go back to it and play. When i feel this i want to do the opposite.
I want to be removed even more from it and it makes me feel like I'm tearing apart a since of my own free will. If this is the case and I do have my own free will. They when can't I choose to be removed from this? Why do I feel the need to go back? It's an addiction, like getting off cigs or alcohol.. I have to give myself time to be removed from the behavior.
God be with me, as I get through this....
With love to all :)
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